Reborn into a Dream

What if I forget this dream,
that brought me to this place?
What if I forget the lies,
that there's anything at stake?

Would I wake up with vision clear,
and ask myself sincerely
what the hell I'm doing here?

Over many oceans to find a place in a foreign land.
Following a dream and trusting in it's end,
That somehow it would take me back,
to where it all began ...

The great blue ocean of peace.

So what if I forget this dream?
And just let go of everything?

If tomorrow I wake up with fresh eyes,
what new dream will be reborn?
I dare to guess a world,
where nothing can be left to lose,
and fear shall reign no more.

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Life Come Crucify Me

Life come crucify me.
Let my body hang by the pain of it's wounds on the very cross I bear.

Pierce my heart with the spear of truth,
Let my life blood flow into the soil of divine creation.

Take everything I have to give.
Let fire consume me until there is nothing left of me.

Let what is left dance with the stars.

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Letting go of doing

The road to hell is paved with good intentions.

The path to awakening is littered with shattered dreams.

Dream on doer, dream on.

Let my dreams and foolish romances break my heart wide open, again and again.

Along this mysterious path I see signs hidden in the understory ...

'You are lost in Destiny, there is no exit! Enjoy the ride!'

'You have come to the end (of your dream). Now turn back (inwards)!'

(The road humps are not signposted - you can hurt yourself if you don't take care).

Through the mountains and the valleys gatekeepers appear in unexpected places, that will not allow me to pass, until I've given everything that I have to give, and fully accepted everything as it is, has been and will be.

Perhaps by grace I will be guided to the end of this path.

A dead end, that leads nowhere.

Except into a wild blue destiny,
where only freedom can find me.

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View from the Bridge

I am standing on a bridge.

It is a wide bridge, supported by huge supports, columns, that come from below. Between the columns and the floor of the bridge they support there are spaces that allow me to see into the deep valley below.

This bridge offered me a vision. A view, from which I could see something that inspires me into the heavens. A vision that fuelled me, that gave me strength.

Upon this bridge all are free to travel and cross. Now something has parked itself on this bridge, something that has spoiled my view, my vision. I cannot see clearly any more.

I cannot understand it, for their is no understanding. It's something I must accept.

I feel the wind as it blows me towards the other side of the bridge. There is something mysterious there. It is unknown. In order for me to get there I need to let go of the attachment to this vision, to this view.

I have worked, perhaps wastefully, on work that did not require so much effort. Destiny is changeless. I look back and see the work and energy that has gone into building this bridge and the wonderful vision that it offered, but upon contemplation I realise that it serves me no purpose if it is a bridge that serves only for a vision and not for crossing.

It seems that now is the time to let go and see what's on the other side.

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Political Revelation

I had a revelation today as I was walking to the chapel,

The chapel of Saint Gabriel.

Who shares the same name as my father.

I have had many thoughts arise,
about possible resistance and what I would confront,
when face to face,
with the father
of the chapel.

I felt that I was in need of courage
to speak honestly,
of what concerns me.

I partook in the herb of the holy sacrament prior to visiting the chapel. There may be some that argue that this is avoidance and escape, if so then one must also recognise the effect it has, for if it gives courage, or rather 'encourages' me, to speak honestly, then what can be said of this plant's true value?

So on my journey, my revelation came to me.
It was about finding a new and safe space that allowed me to 'rest' in a deep conviction.
A conviction in something unbreakable and incorruptible.
The truth.
I wanted to speak my heart
In clear words (with clarity).
To express to him, my need: to see Nature (God) respected.
(There is someone disrespecting the chapel grounds)

Also, I wanted to recognise him, get to know him.
For he is my neighbour.
... and I wonder, how does the father of a chapel of a small village see the world?

From the blue, these are the words that came to me ...

---

If one expresses there intention honestly [from the heart] then the truth will reveal itself.

If one attempts to influence the outcome
through the use of politics (politeness),
then false appearances will soon become apparent
[and the loss of dignity will occur].

There must be a willingness and a courage to communicate honestly
[knowing that this will lead to a higher truth.]

---

From where I stand,
It is the only path that I can see,
for it is the only path that is revealed to me.

Corinthians 4:5
Therefore judge nothing before the time, until the Lord come, who both will bring to light the hidden things of darkness, and will make manifest the counsels [intentions] of the hearts: and then shall every man have praise of God.

And yesterday I saw these these writings on my wall (my facebook wall) ...

The truth is like a lion.
You don't have to defend it.
Let it loose.
It will defend itself.
- Saint Augustine.

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Poverty and Alonenes

Since having started my journey,
pursuing my dream,
and having realised a grand part of it ...

The materialisation of MY peace of land.

... I now, in this moment, find myself in the midst of poverty and aloneness.
Feeling alone, and with no money.
A feeling of 'stuckness' and limitation I feel right now.

It makes me wonder if this is what poverty feels like for those who have been born into the poorest of environments? However, myself, I still feel lucky (fortunate) because I am accompanied and guided by my vision. It is that which keeps me fresh, alive, nourishes me to accept all things that come and carry on regardless of the limitations that present themselves during the course of my journey.

I must admit however that these feelings appear to me like road blocks on the path that lead me to fully realising this vision and when this happens I experience confusion and 'stuckness'. What are of these feelings? What do they mean? Perhaps it is just a problem of not being able to accept these moments and know that they will pass. When I have moments of strife I have questions arise of 'Who am I?' and 'What am I doing here?'. I am reminded of what I'm doing here by the signs that have appeared on my path, that seem to confirm that I'm doing OK and on the right way. As for the question of who I am. This I cannot answer. For when I give an answer it seems that it is never completely true. Perhaps this question can never be answered, or perhaps it is best to just remain silent.

This feeling of poverty and aloneness. Feeling poor and alone.

In one sense, I am in a deep dark whole. A chasm in my mind.

And in another sense, I am fortunate, not only because of the vision that guides me, but also because I feel a great fortune lies at my doorstep. I am at the door of a special opportunity. An opportunity in which most importantly I can ask myself quite whole heartedly what are these chains that bind me? and how can I rid myself of these shackles? What is this abyss I fall into at times, this deep black hole that forms part of my whole?

I smoke some ganja. The pressure of the shackles are eased, but I know that soon they will reappear again. They will not have disappeared, and will most likely not disappear until I have transcended this 'scenario'. Perhaps I am fortunate to have it at hand so that I can temporally transcend these moments, have space to write about it and later reflect on it again.

I believe that what I'm facing is an opportunity to transform aloneness and poverty.

And NOW I am reminded of the line I read earlier today from Osho:

"To be alone is the only real revolution. To accept that you are alone is the greatest transformation that can happen to you."

Another sign along the path.

Why has my dream brought me here I ask?

Perhaps what this means is that my dream cannot be realised until I have become one and alone.

In union I shall find communion.

In unity I shall find community.

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Father Rest in Peace

Let it all go, the fears. Let it all be as it is. For this day is chosen, for him, and for you.
He did not live the life he dreamed.
He lost himself in a sea of troubles,
after the death of his beloved.
And so for my father,
I live the dream, my dream, and his own dream of which was broken,
by his own sadness and despair.
Today I cry for this beautiful man, who’s purity of heart is the only thing that remains.
May the image of my father rest in peace within me.
And may it carry me wisely on my way.

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